Without Her
by Gunslinger Exile
Summary: Something is bothering Ichigo, whatever it is has caused him to become cold towards the one he cares about Rukia. Having being hurt by the strawberry, Rukia runs back to the one person she trusts the most....Renji. Chapter two added
1. Chapter 1

**Okay before I start I must point out,that this ismyfirst Bleach fanfiction so please be nice in your reviews, and that it isn't my fault if Ichimaru seems weird...he is normally weird so there's no real point. Also this is a little bit AU-ish...kinda ignoring the whole 'Rukia-getting-taken-back-to-Soul-Society-and-being-put-up-for-Execution' thing...so yeah. Please be nice in ya reviews thanks n.n**

**-Kiku/Rukia-san**

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* * *

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**Legend**

_(…)_ - thoughts

_Italics_ - Dreams/Flashbacks

- x - - Change of view(not POV, third person view)

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**Without Her**

**Chapter One**

Nightmares she hated nightmares, she hated them so much. But they kept on haunting her sleep, showing her things she would rather not know about.

_Pitch black darkness surrounded her, making her black shinigami robe blend in effortlessly, she was running zanpakutou in her hands but she was running, running from something she couldn't see. Rukia could feel the fear building up in herself, as the empty echoes of her footsteps run inside her ears._ (Why…why am I running?) _Rukia suddenly stopped, her grip on her zanpakutou panting as the fear continued to build up in her chest. "Stop it Rukia! A Kuchiki doesn't run from their fears, they face them" she shouted at herself sharply turning on her heel in a battle stance. Katana held at the ready, but within moments a cloak of crimson red clouded her vision and a voice entered her ears._

"_You can't run forever Kuchiki-san"_

"Ah!" Violet optics snapped open as her body jerked upwards, causing her to sit up right and hit her head against the closet door a loud thud echoing throughout the strawberry's room. "Oww" within at least a second the closet door jerked open quickly and Ichigo's head appeared, the usual scowl on his features. Rukia blinked as his frown suddenly changed to a look of concern.

"What is it a Hollow?" he asked blankly, Rukia shook her head which caused him to frown and shake his own head, clearly annoyed. Although it wasn't her fault waking up so suddenly caused her sense of direction to become awol for a moment. Biting her bottom lip, the shinigami brought a hand to Ichigo's head and began to force him out, forgetting his stubborn attitude.

"It's nothing you idiot now go back to bed" she muttered forcing a frown on her features, violet optics watched as an eyebrow twitch _(Oh…no…)_. Suddenly he forced her back, now also inside the closet towering over the raven haired girl. Both seemed to be oblivious to the position they were in, the orange haired shinigami was leaning over her, his hands pinning her own down. Honey brown optics glaring at lavender hued eyes, both their minds taking their dear time to catch up.

"You annoy me sometimes" he mumbled sourly.

"I do my best" Rukia replied sarcastically lacing her voice with venom, suddenly everything went quiet she didn't move as honey brown eyes captured her own, her body froze all logical thoughts escaped her. _(N-nani?...what is…what is this feeling?)_ a yawn could be heard from outside the closet, which caused both of time to be snapped out of each others gaze.

Rukia's eyes were reluctantly pulled away from Ichigo's and went to the open closet door, "Kon…" she whispered the colour draining from her face. As if on cue the lion plushie appeared, blinking a couple of times at the two his mind thinking the worst by default.

"ICHIGO WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO NEE-SAN?" Kon screamed pouncing on the strawberry and _clawing_ him to death, Ichigo merely let go of one of her wrists to pry the plush from his body and throwing him to the other side of the Ichigo's room. And it was at that moment that the raven haired shinigami's mind caught up, _(Nani?...What is…Ichigo…doing in here….AAAH)_ violet optics widened in shock with a sudden burst of strength she pushed a surprised Ichigo off her causing him to hit his head on one of the walls of her small sleeping space.

"What the heck? Rukia!" He snarled as she used her legs to kick him out the rest of the way. If that wasn't enough, Rukia then slammed the closet door, hiding the furious red blush that had crept up on her cheeks. "Idiot" she muttered rubbing her cheeks, gods she was so confused what was that feeling and why on earth was she feeling it when Ichigo was so close to her. Shaking her head the shinigami buried her face into her pillow, slowly but surely falling back to sleep. This time without any nightmares.

* * *

Another boring night of patrolling. Renji frowned leaning on the railing of one of the many towers of the Court of Pure Souls, staring out at the starry night sky boredly, it had been only two days since he was promoted to vice captain of the sixth squad, ironically that very person he had been training to overcome was his captain. Rather ironic when he thought about it, with a sigh he scratched his head pushing off the railing then continue to walk.

"Ah I see they picked a wonderful shinigami for the vice captain position of the sixth squad eh Abarai-fukataichou?" a cheery voice came from behind him.

_(Ichimaru…)_ The vice captain turned around to face the fox faced man who was-as per usual-grinning, something really crept Renji out about this man, he couldn't place what it was but it just made his skin crawl. "Nice night ain't it sir?" he asked almost in a monotone, Gin merely chuckled and jumped down off the railing he had been sitting on. Renji found it odd that all the captains had a habit of coming up to someone without making a sound what so ever, yet he did the same thing sometimes.

"Hai hai, a very nice night indeed. I see you are stuck with patrol Abarai-fukataichou" Gin replied rubbing his head slightly, "What a dull way of spending the night eh?" the third squad captain pointed out with a shake of his head.

"It can't be helped I suppose" Renji managed to reply a little taken back with Gin's whole attitude. Choosing to ignore it the red head shrugged before blinking, "Um what are you doing out here Ichimaru?" he asked impulsively forgetting to add 'taichou' as a sing of respect. The other shinigami merely laughed and shrugged also, a hand being brought to the back of his head to rub it.

"Tonight isn't the sort of night to be cooped up inside Abarai-fukataichou. With that aside I hear you and Kuchiki-san know each other quite well eh?" The mere mention of Rukia caused Renji to jump in surprise, he growled slightly clearly touchy on the subject.

"What about it?"

Ichimaru chuckled lightly running a hand through his hair, "Nothing, just Kuchiki-san has been gone for about three weeks now, one would start to wonder if she was alright" he stated an innocent look plastering itself on his face. Although the ever fox like grin was still on his face, a grin which was sending chills down his spine.

"She can take care of herself. Something is probably holding her up"

"Lets just hope that is all it is eh Abarai-fukataichou" Ichimaru then turned around on his heel and began off, not waiting to hear if the red head shinigami had anything to say.

Renji snorted watching the third squad captain disappear into the night, leaving him alone yet again. All this talk about that raven haired squirt had him thinking about her, "Bah!" the vice captain shook his head and crossed his arms across his chest and snorting. "Why bother even bringing her up? I couldn't care what she does"

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_(Damn that woman takes forever) _Ichigo frowned rubbing his head as he stared at the closet door silently wondering to himself if she was ever going to come out of there. Staring down at the tray containing their breakfast and then back at the closet door, shrugging he went to knock on the closet door only to find himself tumbling backwards seconds later, trying to save the tray from spilling orange juice everywhere.

"What the- Rukia!" he gritted his teeth putting the tray on his desk so it doesn't end up becoming all over his bedroom floor, the raven haired shinigami blinked looking over at the orange haired teen, blinking in confusion.

"What is it Ichigo?" she asked putting her hands on her hips and tilting her head to the right, something in the way she did that sent shivers down his spine. Wait this wasn't right, he was thinking Rukia, Kuchiki Rukia was attractive…the world must be going nuts, yeah that's it. Not in any way possible was Rukia attractive, especially towards him of all people.

"Did you have to come out like that!" Ichigo growled running a hand through his hair, honey brown optics narrowing in annoyance as he watched her quickly slip her socks on. Rukia didn't reply, she merely glared at him and took a piece of toast from his mouth just as he had bitten on it. Smiling in a somewhat childish manner, she quickly gathered her books up and slipped her shoes on, Ichigo watched her silently before his mind registering the fact he was staring…yet again.

What was wrong with him, he had caught himself staring at her three times this week it was getting rather ridiculous, truly ridiculous. The orange haired shinigami was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the window open and a voice gracing his ears, "Ichigo I'm leaving now" spinning around he saw the raven haired girl sitting on the window sill as if waiting for him to say something.

"Yeah…I'll meet you at the corner" he mumbled watching her nod before disappearing out the window. Sometimes he really hated that woman, but sometimes he love her just as much.

Man he was really fucked up.


	2. Chapter 2

**Yay the long awaited chapter two! I should get the second chapter to 'Hope Fades' done soon shouldn't I? Yeah well hope you guys enjoy this chapter**

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Bleach or it's characters (sadly), although I'm currently holding a number of the characters hostage in a closet…who you may ask. I, Kuchiki Rukia, shall never tell :D –evil grin-

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**Reviews;**

**ChibiSoulReaperRukia; **Muahaha! Triangles are fun, or that's how I see 'em -shifty eye look- ooh you did! I'll make sure to remind myself to go read it whenever I get the chance to thanks for the review and I hope you like this chapter!

**osilly; **Looks like ya got ya wish! XD here's the next chapter enjoy!

**Hiromi-San; **w00t!...wait am I awesome or is it the fic? I can't tell -grins- Look new chapter! ZOMG! XD

**Sleepies; **-evil snicker- I might, but then I might not write RenRuki. Who knows what goes through my mind, the evil plots that are being…plotted XD. Sorry if I confused ya it'll be explained later…and stuff :D

**Yuniepie; **ZOMG IT'S -insert name here- HI! -waves- Ya right in a way, no one can tell what's going through Ichi-nii's mind. Beside they are both too stubborn to admit it anyways, so who knows what is gonna happen…who knows -cue evil laugher and lightning-

Ichigo:….o.O okay then…-edges away-

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**Legend**

_(…)_ - thoughts

_Italics_ - Dreams/Flashbacks

- x - - Change of view (third person view)

**Without Her**

**Chapter Two**

"Rukia-san!" Rukia blinked her attention being dragged off the frowning Ichigo to a high pitched voice calling out her name, violet optics looked around spotting a flash of orange hair heading their way. "Ah Inoune-san" she greeted putting on her school voice instantly as the other girl came running up towards them both, Tatsuki following close behind.

"Hey Inoune, Tatsuki" Ichigo greeted before spotting Chad, using the tall man was an excuse to get away from Rukia. The raven haired girl paid no mind as he ran off, only smiled sweetly at her orange haired friend, "How are you today Inoune-san?" she asked sweetly as the three began to walk.

"Wonderful!" the orange haired girl replied skipping merrily beside the two dark haired teens, Rukia smiled brushing strands of raven black hair behind her ears, it amazed her how oblivious Inoune could be at times, how she could block out all the world's troubles and get lost in a little world of her own. Her musings were cut short when Tatsuki spoke up, eyeing the shinigami in curiosity.

"What about you Rukia? You look like you haven't gotten enough sleep" the darked haired fighter pointed out, Rukia laughed weakly shaking her head slightly, unlike Inoune Tatsuki is somewhat more observant. One could tell by the black rings around her eyes that she hadn't been getting much sleep at all, which was true. Rukia hadn't been getting any sleep with nightmares haunting her dreams almost every night of the week.

"Ah…well…I haven't been able to sleep lately" she replied violet optics looking at the ground below her feet; she heard Inoune gasp and then a pair of hands were clasped on her tiny shoulders. She blinked looking up to see the orange haired girl smiling and Tatsuki standing behind her looking a little bit confused.

"Don't worry Rukia-san, whatever it is that is bothering you will surely go away soon right?"

The raven haired shinigami couldn't help but smile even the slightest and nod, "Let's hope so"

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As per usual classes were the same and also very confusing to the shinigami, and as per usual she somehow managed to copy all of Ichigo's answers like she always does. But like the day before, her mind wandered while the teacher was explaining something, _(Ichigo…that stupid idiot. Why on earth can't I stop thinking about what that moron did last night…ugh Rukia maybe it's a good idea to stop thinking all togeth-) _

"Miss Kuchiki!"

Rukia was snapped out of her thoughts when the voice of the teacher entered her ears, sitting up straight violet optics were pried from her paper and moved to the front of the room. "Yes sensei?" she asked innocently again her acting prevailed.

"Please pay close attention Miss Kuchiki, the next thing I'm going to explain is of high importance for the coming test"

"Yes ma'am"

The class ran smoothly after that, neither Rukia nor anyone else said anything after that, unless it was a question to do with the class. Although the shinigami could feel a pair of honey brown optics watching her every now and again, it seemed that neither of them had forgotten what had happened the night before.

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"Damn that women" a snort escaped the strawberry's throat as he stood waiting for a certain raven haired shinigami to get here, but no she was taking her dear time yet again. How typical of her. Running a hand through fiery orange haired, he shook his head getting annoyed with her fast. _(Two more minutes Rukia before I'm leaving without you)_ he though sourly. Then as if on cue the raven haired girl appeared with that sickly sweet smile on her lips, the one that was nothing more than fake.

"Cut it out Rukia" Ichigo stated scowling as per usual.

Of course the shinigami did, the fake smile being replaced with her default emotionless mask, "Lets go already" she said coldly walking right pass the orange haired teen, causing him to blink in mild confusion.

- -x- -

Rukia sighed walking a couple of steps in front of the other shinigami, violet optics staring blankly at the ground. She was unable to wipe the event from last night from her mind, it slowly replayed itself over and over again in her head. She hated it, because she hated human emotions, it was like she was becoming attached to the strawberry and that was something she couldn't afford to do. _Beep, beep, beep_

Her train of thoughts was cut when a beeping noise came from her blazer, causing both of them to stop dead in their tracks. Pulling the cellphone out, Rukia stared at it before frowning. "Hollow not far from here" she spoke putting the phone away and pulling out her skull glove, only to see Ichigo run right pass her.

The scream of a Hollow erupted into the air causing the orange haired shinigami to stop on the spot and turned around; Rukia stuck out her hand and pushed at his chest pushing his soul right out. The scream grew louder before time froze on the stop, a long claw reached out cold metal digging into her before she was pushed back, the raven haired shinigami gasped as she hit something solid and slid down.

"RUKIA!" that was the last thing she heard before all she saw was black.

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Ichigo brought the zanpakutou right down the middle of skull mask, causing the Hollow to scream in pain before exploding into dust that swirled around him. Without a moment to spare the shinigami returned to his body and darted towards the unconsciously girl, scooping her up in his arms. "Shit…she's bleeding" he muttered before running towards the only place he could think of…home.

After a couple of minutes her blood had already covered most of his hand, _(Must hurry)_ the strawberry thought as he skidded around a corner making sure not to let go of the raven haired shinigami in his hands. "Don't you dare die on me Rukia" he mumbled as the Kurosaki Clinic came into view, he didn't take any chance and crashed threw the door.

"Nii-chan what's wro-?" Yuzu gasped seeing the limp girl in his hands. Hands went and covered her mouth, watching as her brother gave her a pleading look.

"Get…pops" Ichigo panted, his grip increasing on the out cold shinigami. Yuzu quickly disappeared from the room, and then within a couple of seconds Isshin appeared with his little sister. Dark eyes wide in confusion, only to widen seeing the raven haired girl in his arms.

"She…was hurt…pops help her"

* * *

_(…Ichigo) _

"..hmm" Her head hurt, so did her arms…come to think about it her whole body hurt. Violet hued optics cracked open only to shut again as a blinding white light was all she saw, _(Where am I?)_ she thought cracking her eyes open yet again, all she was greeted by was that same blinding white light after a couple of seconds the outline of someone's head appeared blocking the blinding bright light.

"Rukia?" The voice, it was Ichigo's. Her mind brightened causing a slight smile to appear on her face, when her eyes were able to focus to the light she could see the worried look on his face which was quickly replaced with a frown. _(He…was worried?)_ she thought opening her eyes up completely, with a small snort Rukia managed to push herself up into a sitting position grunting when Ichigo attempted to push her back down.

"Rukia lay back down" he stated only to get a glare out of the shinigami.

"I'm fine Ichigo don't worry about me" she ordered _(You tell me I worry to much….)_, Ichigo glared back at her with the same sort of strength.

The shinigami frowned before pushing the blankets off herself, causing the strawberry to growl slightly she knew he wanted her to stay were she was thought she could do it she would rather be in her closet that in a bed in the Kurosaki Clinic. Sliding off the bed, Rukia's eyes widened when her knees gave in underneath her causing her to fall forwards onto the orange haired teen.

All logical thoughts escaped her mind as it went black, the feeling of her lips coming in contact with his suddenly entered her mind before disappearing again. _(Nani…)_

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Muahaha! Cliff hanger much? It's about time I finished this chapter, it took me forever :D Also the whole 'Rukia going back to Renji' thing will be explained much later, so sorry if it had confused anyone heh. Anyways R&R peoples!

-Kiku


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